Never Wash Your Face Again with These Products

Because splashing a handful of water on your face is never like the commercials — leave the sink out of your skincare.
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 Maybe it's because I live in a dorm and avoid the hall bathroom like the art school germ fest that it is, or maybe it's because old habits die hard — either way, skin care that is more elaborate than a dab here and a swipe there never really caught on with me. This includes washing my face, which felt (feels!) like an unnecessary evil and is something I have somewhat rebelliously dropped from my routine. Making a foamy swamp out of my face and, almost always, whatever I’m wearing is simply too much for me to take in the morning. Plus, that’s, like, five extra minutes of waking up to do something that isn’t eating my Trader Joe’s muffin. Thankfully, the skin care industry has  gifted anti-washers with a variety of products that are less extra than a 13-step skin routine. Introducing: the easy-peasy, lemon-sheet-mask-squeezy gems that will heal your skin without damaging your time and/or patience. 

Disco Kitten Illuminating Diamond Peel-Off Mask

Peel-off masks are pretty much my saving grace. They have all the pore-sucking powers, yet none of the clean up or sacrificed face towels! The Disco Kitten Illuminating Peel-Off Mask is my biggest lazy skincare enabler, as it takes my obsession a step further with its (yes) illuminating qualities. I can practically see myself in my own face while wearing this thing, and if your skin care isn’t offering you this kind of existential experience while cleaning your skin, then what is it doing?

Disco Kitten's Illuminating Peel-Off Mask, $23, is available at Ulta Beauty

Milk Makeup Matcha Toner

What’s that sound? Oh, it’s just the Milk Makeup Bandwagon heading our way, and this is me stepping happily on it — all thanks to their solid Matcha Toner. Toner, as you intermediates may know, typically comes as a liquid (!!!) that requires the use of cotton balls and other materials (!!!) to wipe the face (!!!) clean of impurities . . . A.K.A., toner generally requires you to make the tiresome transition from dry to wet to dry, which is pretty much my main whine throughout this entire piece. However, Milk has successfully created a solid green angel baby of a toner for greasers like moi to scribble over their face and call it clean. Cheers to three extra minutes in the morning not spent cleaning spilt skin juice and the saving of cotton ball lives everywhere *plastic Matcha Toner caps clink around the world.* 

Milk Makeup's Matcha Toner, $26, is available at Sephora

Cosrx Pimple Master Patch

Some people would say my generation is willing to do the crime but not the time. To the non-washers out there, I think we can all agree that these pimple patches from Cosrx are proof that we know no consequence — for breaking the laws of skin care, at least. Smooth one over your breakout and begin to feel the innate happiness that only a pimple-dissolving face sticker can bring to one’s life. 

Cosrx's Pimple Master Patches, $6, are available at Urban Outfitters

Klairs Freshly Juiced Vitamin Drop

While this serum *does* require hand-to-face, dry-to-wet contact, I will excuse it on the grounds that it is, I assume, doing the work of all the Flintstone vitamins I threw away as a child. I am also obsessed with the idea that a serum can solve 98.5% of my problems, and so far, the Vitamin Drop has not disappointed. It rubs in a bit heavier than serums I have experienced in the past; granted, that could be because they weren’t “Freshly Juiced” and boasting the same hefty lineup of real fruit and plant extracts.

Klairs's Freshly Juice Vitamin Drops, $26, are available at Wishtrend

Pearlessence Micellar Water Wipes

I’m not going to pretend to know the ins and outs of micellar water, but I do know that Pearlessence has put it into a face wipe — one of my favorite contraptions — and that’s enough for me to deem it a non-washer’s essential. When was the last time you were able to wipe the latest wellness craze across your face? Or own a cactus-scented product? Well, it’s almost 2018, and you can do both without worry that the “infused cactus water” will go anywhere (i.e. collar of your shirt, down your neck) but your pores to gently exfoliate and cleanse.

Pearlessence's Micellar Water Facial Wipes, $10, are available at Urban Outfitters

Kocostar Slice Mask

If you love pre-cut fruit but are less enthusiastic about pasting entire sheets of sopping paper on your face in the name of skin care, rejoice! Kocostar’s Slice Mask is a sheet of face mask patches shaped like the stereotypical spa cucumbers and lemons - the beauty equivalent of a food platter. Adhere one to problematic areas without sacrificing the comfort (and mobility) of your entire face. 

Kocostar's Slice Mask, $12, is available at World Market

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